Five languages of love by Gary Chapman
In addition to the fact that each of us is different, and the gender also differs in a couple, each of us also have our own individual language of love - the way we express feelings. Dr. Gary Chapman, for over 30 years, has been advising spouses who got lost in mutual recognition of the languages of love. Its effectiveness can be proved by the fact that Chapman's books are recommended today on a majority of pre-marital courses. According to dr. Chapman, the key to happiness in a relationship is to know what language of love our beloved prefers, and in this language to communicate with him, and to tell him what language best suits you.
There are so many different ways to express your love to the person with whom you are in love, and one of the most significant ones is touch. The power of touch is incredibly profound. Our skin is the pathway for touch which is the most fundamental human need. It is one of the most powerful means of communication. The first language that we learn even before learning our mother tongue. It could help us nurture our relationship and our well-being. It conveys so many unsaid words. When words fail, a single touch can express all you need to say.
Click on NEXT page to see read about different types of love languages we have!
Many research studies that have been conducted show that during childhood when there is greater physical affection, later, the rate of physical violence is lower. Contrarily, the person grows to be a more aggressive one, physically or mentally, when the skinship is limited in the family during childhood. It also is a stress reliever. A hug or a cuddle from the right person at the right time can reduce stress levels immensely by lowering the blood pressure and cortisol.
David Linden, a renowned neuroscientist, was asked about the power of just a simple touch, he said: "The most critical function of interpersonal touch is to build trust and cooperation. It’s the ability to strengthen a bond and communicate, I’m on your side. I’m an ally. You can trust me. It derives from maternal touch when we are babies, but it persists throughout our lives as a social glue of sorts. And it is what binds sexual partners into lasting couples, and brings people and the family together, and creates strong teams."
Based on Dr. Gary Chapman, there are 5 languages for love; find all 5 on NEXT page!
Truth to be told, we are all gift receivers. No matter what we say, deep down we do love to be surprised with a gift no matter how big or small that gift is! Well, not really. If it is what we like and something we could not afford, then our dream will come true. So how about getting us the mostly-anticipated gift and something you know that we would need so we all can be happy?! The only drawback of this type is that the partners will go broke finding the perfect present for you.
2. Words of Affirmation
We can say that these people are the easiest to please because only calling them "baby" or "love" is enough for them to feel good. Thanking them and expressing appreciations with words is what will work for them the best. They lose their sense of security and confidence when they see nothing in return from the people they love. To them only a "thank you" is enough but being reluctant about it makes them feel like they are worth nothing to you and they become insecure!
Click on NEXT page to see what kind of people use the act of service!
3. Acts of Service
When you think of acts of service, probably the first person who crosses your mind is no other than your mother. They will provide for you, will do anything to make you feel comfortable. Take care of you when you are sick. That is the act of service. Some may lack the ability to express the love they have for you, but they are expressing it in the only way they know how. These people are not looking for anything in return. They know how important efficiency is and they try their best to provide it for you.
4. Quality time
People who go with this way of expressing love are the ones that no matter where they are, they want to be right next to you. It can be a whole day of literally doing nothing, not even talking. Just sitting together and appreciating each other's existence! This is not an easy stage of the relationship, and you need to be so comfortable with your significant other to stay in absolute silence with them, but it is also the right one! People who choose this one are completely aware of the value the time has and how they will not be able to get it back once it is gone. However, they sometimes may be a little bit clingy.
Check the last language on the NEXT page!
5. Physical touch
There is a ‘cuddle chemical’ called Oxytocin, and it only releases when you receive wanted affection. You only need twenty seconds of hugging, back rubbing or gentle stroking to trigger the release of Oxytocin into your body. This will build the feeling of trust and connection in you. It changes the way people feel about you to a nicer version. Of course, the touch needs to be in a way that makes you feel appropriate and safe. Even a quick touch on the back can make you feel better. This is the easiest and the most affectionate way of expressing love. People who choose touch are uncomplicated and straightforward.
Whatever way it is that you are more comfortable with, showing how much you love the person you are in love with and expressing it in words is a lot more effective than hiding it. The person you are with needs to know how much you care about them and how happy you are to have them with you in your life so why don’t you let them know?! These are all tiny things that can help your relationship last longer and be more romantic than ever!
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